Why I Still Color with My Kids
My kids are not toddlers anymore; they are past the age when some crayons and papers at the dining room table will keep them entertained while I cook dinner. Now we have sports and homework, school plays and chorus concerts that we fit dinner around.
In the winter, I bought a used Ikea table on marketplace and made a small craft area for my daughter in a room that has been through more transformations than any other room in our home. The idea was that I could reclaim my dining room and she would have a place where she could find all of her craft materials. This space has worked out great for her, but I also found myself drawn to the sunshine that falls so nicely in that room. I decided to pick up some markers and a “cozy coloring book” for myself.
Not long after, my kids would find me listening to an audiobook and coloring in the evening. They expressed interest in a book of their own. Pretty soon the three of us were tucked around the secondhand table coloring and chatting. This set up reminded me of the magic of sharing our feelings when we have something to keep our hands busy.
Think back to some of the times when it has been easiest for you to tell someone how you feel or talk about the thoughts that are rattling around in your mind. I often find when my kids are in the back seat and I’m driving they share more, or when I lay down next to them and the lights are low. The same can be said for when we sit with each other and color while we chat. All those times have something in common that I think helps with the ability to share deeply. One is having a relationship with the person you want to share your thoughts with and knowing they won’t make you feel dumb or silly or scary. The other is that we don’t have to directly look at the person while we share. There’s a helpfulness to having a buffer between you and the person you choose to share deep thoughts with.
Yes, my kids are older and we still color together. We sit at a tiny table in a small sunny room and color in our cozy coloring books while we share our thoughts and worries and jokes. It has been a simple way to enjoy each other and give an opportunity for them to open up when they want or need to. You don’t need a specific table, or space, or room to do this with your family. Try starting a hobby you enjoy and leaving space for your kids or spouse to join you if they are interested. They could do what you’re doing or do something that interests them. The most important thing is that it’s something that can be done while you talk (not a phone or video game) it could be drawing, coloring, puzzles, Legos – you get the idea. Just start, and let it grow.